Only one comedian can rival the late Bob Saget’s take on the classic “aristocrats” joke: Gilbert Gottfried, the gritty comedian who rejoiced and died at the age of 67.
2005 movie Aristocrats He documented the history of the joke, which was so sloppy that comedians traditionally told it backstage at clubs rather than the spotlight. The joke has a simple setup: a family visits a talent agent to show him a new act. They perform sexual acts on each other to the point that anyone with a sense of human decency might call it “unspeakable.” And for ta da, they tell the agent that their verb is called, “aristocrats.” In the movie, Gottfried said he heard the joke called “aristocrats” and “evolved” and “blood shit and come eat each other outside and Fistfucking a Dog” — “but then,” he said, “the punchline didn’t work well” because it wasn’t There really is a discrepancy.”
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Gottfried’s version of the joke was one of the dirtiest jokes in the movie, and Saget only topped it off because people still portrayed him at the time as the family man from Full house. “The talent agent is sitting in his office,” Gottfried says. “A family enters, an all-American family, blonde hair, blue eyes, little son, little daughter, little fluffy dog. So what kind of work do you do?” And the talent agent says, “Then the father begins to take off his shirt and jacket. The mother begins to take off her blouse.” .Very soon, they are all completely naked including the dog who takes off his leash.”
Then he describes Hieronymus Bosch – like a torture plate. Every member of the family, including the dog, violates each other verbally, digitally, and sexually. There are descriptions of the foreskin and forearms as Popeye. The scene is stomach pounding, and that’s the point.
Gottfried says, “The talent agent said, ‘Well, that’s an interesting job.’ What I know is kind of simplistic, because you say, ‘If you have any sense of human etiquette, just say, ‘Why didn’t the talent agent stop them at first?'” Why didn’t he stop them the moment he saw the father undo his clouds and say: That’s totally wrong. Someone’s calling the police and I’ll sneak out. Something terrible is going on.” This is a family that rapes their children and kills a beast. Why, why, why is this allowed to happen?
“But that’s a whole other story,” he was deadlocked. “So they’re covered in urine and filth and blood and they come and sweat, oh, This sweat. And the talent agent says, “What do you call yourselves?” Then the father took out his chest and said: “Aristocrats.”
Earlier in the clip, Gottfried joked that he first heard the joke by 1950s singer Pat Boone. “You know, when Pat Boone started talking about having sex with a dog, he was really feeling it,” he says. Then he followed it by singing some Eid songs.
When asked by one of the film’s directors (Ben Gillett and Paul Provenza) if he had any parting words, Gottfried said, “I just want to conclude by saying that education and family values are very important.”
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